medusa
The version of Medusa’s myth that I knew growing up was probably pretty close to what most people know of her. She was a beautiful maiden with particularly lovely hair who committed herself to a chaste life in order to serve as a priestess to Athena. Athena was jealous, and when she found out that Medusa and Poseidon had broken her vow of chastity she went ballistic. She cursed Medusa, transforming her beautiful hair into a tangle of poisonous snakes. Anyone who looked at Medusa from that point forward would turn to stone. Medusa retreated to a remote island where she began collecting stone statues of the men who tried to kill her. Her head was considered a prize; whoever could sever it would hold a weapon far more powerful than any other against their enemies. She was finally beheaded by the heroic Perseus, who used a mirror to avoid her gaze. He beheaded her in her sleep. Eventually Medusa’s head was given to Athena, who placed it on her shield.
This version leaves out a really important detail that I only learned recently. Poseidon raped Medusa. He tried to seduce her, she didn’t want him, and he got pissed and raped her in Athena’s temple, purposefully choosing that location for extra insult to Athena. This isn’t a particularly shocking detail, given the fact that sexual violence against women is a very common theme in Greek mythology. And that isn’t particularly shocking when Greek mythology is examined in the context of the time it was written, as well as by whom it was written. The poorest most destitute beggar in ancient Greece held more power than a woman, so long as he was male. Big important things like writing, philosophizing, and collecting each other’s sweat after naked wrestling in the olympics were seen as far above the intellectual capabilities of a woman. As a result, it is impossible to learn about Greek mythology, and a giant portion of history in general, without donning a pair of spectacles known as the “male gaze”. Once I began to understand what that really means and how insanely present it is in everything ever, I found it very hard to un-see.
So now that I’m older, wiser, and aware of these troublesome specs, I have a lot of thoughts about Medusa’s story in particular. What if I dissect it, and try to identify all the parts that might hold cultural bias? It’s hard, because to do it honestly I have to identify my own biased beliefs. Here’s just one example: Medusa’s beautiful hair. If I read it without questioning bias, I’d think ok, sure. Wow. Sounds like some hair I’d love to have. I mean, if Pantene commercials have taught me anything, it’s that gorgeous hair turns men’s heads. And if growing up in the time period of EVER has taught me anything, it’s that turning men’s heads is the big goal, right? If I get rid of all of that bullshit and decide to see hair for what it actually is (dead cells that hang off my scalp), a bouffant of venomous snakes that don’t kill me sounds WAY COOLER. What’s that? But they do kill men who creep on me? You mean if some dude has it in mind to rape me, all I have to do is look at him and he’s a rock? Um, okay.
What if I read Medusa’s story without buying into the belief that women are jealous, catty, vengeful beings who compete with and hate one another? It sure seems like Athena was protecting Medusa in that case. Or maybe transforming her into a protector of all women. In fact, Medusa comes from a word meaning to guard or protect. Makes sense why Athena would want her on her shield. It also makes me look at the result of Medusa’s “curse” quite differently. Wearing those male gaze glasses, I saw her existence on an island full of stone men as very tragic and lonely. When I take them off, I see Medusa living a lush life of doing whatever the hell she wanted in nature. She was free from the misogynistic society that wrote her story, she had some cool garden sculptures, and a bitchin’ hairdo. There was a benefit for the rest of the world too. One at a time, Medusa was ridding it of the type of guy who thought head-hunting a rape victim was a fun game.
This idea of the lens with which we view the world is something that has stayed with me throughout this entire project. Those particular glasses do not show us reality. If they did, I wouldn’t have had to dig as hard as I did to learn about these women. Those glasses show us a myth that we are under no obligation to accept, just as I am under no obligation to accept the Medusa myth I was told as a child. We are free to sort through it, dissect it, and question everything. Once I did that with Medusa, I no longer saw her as an ugly and tragic character. I saw her as an unparalleled BADASS.
I really wasn’t expecting this clarity to be my biggest takeaway from this project. And I DEFINITELY wasn’t expecting the enormous role that everyone following it would have in helping me remove those glasses for myself. If you told me awhile back that I would end up painting myself, I would have laughed heartily. In fact, after a few people suggested it, I distinctly remember telling my mom I’d rather jump off a bridge. I have never in my life felt as seen and supported and cheered for as I have in the last 100 days. This painting is for every badass woman who has helped me get to the finish line. I would have given up about two weeks in if it weren’t for you. I would not have felt empowered to paint myself if it weren’t for you. You not only helped me remove those glasses, but you made me look in the mirror without them on, and you’ll never believe what I saw. A badass who set a big-ass goal AND CRUSHED IT. Let’s burn 2020 to the ground and throw those glasses in the fire.
Thank you ❤️