i am sassa

Tori Amos is an otherworldly and perfect angel sent to Earth to help us all cope with the woes of the modern day. She is also a complete badass.

Here are just a few reasons for the latter:

• She was expelled from Johns Hopkins Peabody Conservatory for “musical insubordination” when she was eleven. To me, the expulsion ranks high above the fact that she was the youngest person ever admitted at five years old. The conservatory tried to “break” her habit of playing by ear so that she would more neatly fit into their understanding of how things should be/ have always been done, but she wasn’t fond of that. Also she liked to play modern music, which I’m sure offended the delicate sensibility of the stuffy assholes at the conservatory. Musical insubordination. I just wanted to type it again.

• She began composing music at the age of three. Didn’t we all, really, but she was really really good at it. By the time she was two, she could play pieces she had only heard once perfectly. Side note: I find this fascinating, but it also is in direct opposition to the pep talks I like to give regarding the importance of years of dedication and practice to the arts. Clearly, she is the exception here; she is, as I stated earlier, an otherworldly angel.

• Neil Gaiman’s Sandman character Delirium was inspired by Tori, and he is her daughter’s godfather.

• Tori was the first spokesperson for RAINN, the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network. She was the one who answered the very first call which signaled the launch of the hotline. Tori was raped at knifepoint by someone who had come to hear her play when she was 21 years old, and was inspired by this traumatic experience to help others.

If anyone needs me, I will be reanimating the tumultuous emotions of my youth by listening to her music for the remainder of 2020.

Thank you, Tori Amos.